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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25847611">Jared Has a Hangover</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/halo_zero/pseuds/halo_zero'>halo_zero</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Silicon Valley (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen, Hangover, I have no idea what I'm doing, My First AO3 Post</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 05:27:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,442</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25847611</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/halo_zero/pseuds/halo_zero</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared got unexpectedly drunk and is now hung over at the Incubator.  He is uncharacteristically miserable and ill-tempered.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Jared Has a Hangover</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>First post!  I don't know what I'm doing.  Thank you kindly.</p><p>Feel free to leave ideas in the comments as to what you imagine may have occurred during Jared's drunkenness.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Shafts of sunlight fell across the room, slowly and delicately making their way across the entirety of the living space.  One strip of bright light moved across the recliner, where Jared’s sleeping figure was snoring, curled up on its side.  The light eventually reached his chin, then upwards towards his eyes.</p><p>A deep groan came from his lips, the sunlight awakening him from his slumber.  He blinked, then turned his face away from the repulsive light.  He let out another groan as he did this, and tasted a disgusting bitterness in his mouth.</p><p>“Ugh,” he said, blinking his eyes and attempting to sit up.  Instantly, a throbbing in his head began to pound, and he sat there quietly, waiting for it to pass.  It didn’t, exactly, but he found that if he kept his head tilted sideways slightly towards his shoulder, it wasn’t as bad.</p><p>He very slowly pushed the recliner into its standard position.  He let out another grunt of misery as the deep click of the mechanism inside sent a jolt of unpleasantness throughout his head and insides.  He waited, placing his feet on the floor, alarmed to see that he was without pants, and only wearing his boxers and a white undershirt.  He couldn’t see where his other clothes were, and did not wish to turn around and search at this particular moment.  He sat there for a moment, his head pounding, the taste in his mouth even more noticeable.</p><p>Slowly, he started to sit forward, then stand, carefully holding onto the recliner for as long as possible.  He didn’t see anyone around, and carefully made his way to the restroom, keeping his head titled slightly to the side, his eyes half-lidded.</p><p>After evacuating his bladder, which provided a huge amount of relief, he found the brand-new, still in its package toothbrush that he kept stashed on top of the bathroom mirror.  As he brushed his teeth, he was grateful to rid his mouth from the disgusting taste of last night’s revelry.  A sudden gagging sound emitted from his throat as the toothbrush drew dangerously close to the back of his mouth.  Jared paused, water running from his eyes, and ceased brushing.  He rinsed, then stopped for a moment, his long fingers clutching the edges of the sink, afraid of vomiting.  He took a few deep breaths, then stood up and headed to the kitchen.</p><p>“Good morning sunshine,” Dinesh said cheerfully, patting Jared on the back, jostling him uncomfortably.</p><p>“Hmmm,” Jared responded, disheveled and uncommunicative.</p><p>“Wow, you look like shit!”</p><p>“Mmm hmm,” he responded, walking to the refrigerator.  He opened it and found a bottle of water.  Opening it, he began to drink, finishing about half of it before putting it on the counter.</p><p>“You look worse than when we were at Tech Crunch,” Dinesh continued, his dark eyes twinkling with mirth.</p><p>“Hmmm,” Jared responded.  He started bringing out eggs, and bacon, and tortillas. He laid them on the counter.</p><p>“You don’t seem hungover,” Jared accused, his eyes meeting Dinesh's with an icy glance.</p><p>“Oh I’m fine,” Dinesh admitted cheerily.  “I didn’t drink as much as you did.”</p><p>Jared turned on the skillet, laying strips of bacon across it.</p><p>“Hey, Jared?”</p><p>“What?” he muttered.</p><p>“Last night was a lot of fun, wasn’t it?”  He eyed Jared carefully.</p><p>“I guess,” Jared retorted.</p><p>“We had a pretty good talk, didn’t we?”  Dinesh pressed.</p><p>“To tell you the truth, Dinesh, I don’t remember much about last night at all.”  Jared looked up, making eye contact again.  Then he poked at the bacon with a fork, turning it.</p><p>“Ugh,” Jared swallowed, his face turning pale.  “I haven’t been this hungover since that time I took my friend Samantha to her motorcycle club reunion in Barstow.”</p><p>“What?”  Richard asked, as he entered the kitchen.</p><p>"Jesus, we were there for three days..."  Jared continued, more to himself than to anyone else.</p><p>“Jared’s hungover,” Dinesh taunted.  “It must have been all of that delicious vodka we were having.”</p><p>An ugly, lurching sound began to come from Jared, who quickly clapped his hand over his mouth and backed away from the stove.  He attempted to regain his composure, looking desperately at Richard and Dinesh.</p><p>“Don’t let the bacon burn-“ he muttered, his last word transforming into another horrid retching sound, as he ran off to the bathroom.</p><p>Richard watched the bacon, looking over at Dinesh suspiciously.  He grimaced as they both heard the very loud and unmistakable sounds of regurgitation coming from the restroom.</p><p>They heard the sound of a door opening, and Gilfolye emerged into the kitchen.  He made eye contact with no one, and walked straight to the refrigerator.  He opened it, took out a large Gatorade bottle, opened it, and proceeded to drink the entire thing, as Richard and Dinesh watched.  He burped loudly, tossed the bottle in the sink, then took out a second one before turning to the other two.</p><p>“I’m going back to bed,” he said, then walked out.</p><p>Richard removed the bacon from the pan, turning off the heat and beginning to crack the eggs into a bowl.</p><p>“So,” he began quietly, eyeing Dinesh with large, cautious eyes.  “Does Jared remember last night?”</p><p>“Not a thing.”  Dinesh replied, looking relieved.</p><p>“Good,” Richard said, beginning to scramble the eggs with a fork.  He twitched in alarm as Jared reentered the kitchen.</p><p>“Richard, I’ve got it,” Jared said gently, intervening.  He drained some of the extra bacon fat from the pan, then finished scrambling the eggs and added them to the pan.  He stirred carefully as the eggs cooked, scowling, his face ashen.</p><p>“How’re you doing?”  Richard asked quietly, as Dinesh walked over to turn on the coffee machine.</p><p>“I’ve been better,” Jared admitted, an embarrassed smile softening his expression.</p><p>“I guess there’s a reason you don’t drink, huh?”  Richard said, his lips pressed into his own thin, nervous smile.</p><p>Jared eyed Richard with a look of curiosity.  “What do you mean?” he asked, frowning.  His large blue eyes became troubled.</p><p>“Oh nothing, it’s just...uh, we’d never really seen you drunk before,” Richard dismissed, shaking his head slightly and averting his eyes.</p><p>“Richard,” Jared asked, his frown becoming more worrisome.  He leaned closer.  "Was I out of line?  Did I cause a scene?”</p><p>“No, no, no, nothing like that,” Richard said, making an anxious exhalation that resembled a laugh.</p><p>"What did I say, Richard?  Oh God, what did I do?"  Jared's eyes went from Richard's face to the rest of the room, searching.</p><p>“What?”  Richard feigned confusion, laughing again nervously, “Jared, it’s okay…nothing happened.”</p><p>Jared sighed, looking intently at Richard.</p><p>“Are you sure, Richard?  Don’t spare my feelings.  If I acted the fool, I need to know.”</p><p>“Jared,” Richard said quietly, “Nothing happened.”</p><p>Jared eyed Richard closely again, seeming to read his face.  Then he shook his head, looking out again at the space around them.  He sighed and shrugged.</p><p>“Alright, well, that’s a relief.”  he said, taking the pan of eggs off the heat and beginning to warm tortillas on the burner.</p><p>“Doesn’t that hurt?”  Dinesh asked, looking at how Jared’s bare fingers were handling the tortillas over an open flame.</p><p>“Huh?”  Jared looked down, continuing to turn them by hand.</p><p>“This?  Oh no, I’m used to it.”</p><p>Jared began assembling the burritos just as Erlich entered the kitchen.</p><p>“Nice,” he commented.</p><p>“Erlich, do you have any good hot sauce?”  Jared asked him.</p><p>“What do you mean by ‘good?’”</p><p>“Like Cholula or Tapatio?”</p><p>“Of course I do.  I have both.”<br/>“Richard, you don’t want any hot sauce in yours, right?”</p><p>“No, thank you.”  He glanced at Dinesh.</p><p>“Dinesh?”</p><p>“Sure, thank you.”  Dinesh aimed a questioning look at Richard, but said nothing.</p><p>Jared finished assembling the burritos, adding hot sauce to all but Richard’s.</p><p>“Thank you Jared, these look exquisite.”  Erlich commented.</p><p>“They are,” Jared said snippily, surprising the others with uncharacteristic gall.  He grabbed one for himself, wrapped it in a napkin, carrying his half-filled bottle of water with him.</p><p>“Leave one for Gilfoyle,” he muttered.</p><p>He shuffled over to the living room, hunched and miserable.  As he lowered himself back into the recliner, he said, irritably, “I have no desire to do anything else except sit here and eat.  No one <br/>ask me to do anything.”</p><p>“A bit snarky when he’s hungover, isn’t he?”  Erlich said, smiling in spite of himself.  He sidled a furtive look at Richard and Dinesh.</p><p>“You’ll get worse than snarky if you bother me,” Jared said miserably, taking slow bites from his food.</p><p>"Does he remember anything about last night?"  Erlich asked them, his voice hushed.</p><p>"No, thank God."</p><p>They all looked relieved.</p>
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